Wisdom: Wendy

We'd worked together for a number of years, but she was a Senior Vice President, (way up high on our org chart) and worked on a different floor than I did, (first floor, so way down low in the building) ... our paths didn't cross often.

Until. 

Until one day, a few years ago, she invited me to lunch. She intentionally removed the high and low barriers and said, "I'd like for us to be friends."

Say wut? 

I was completely intimidated by this woman. (She led the counselling team/department AND was the leader of our retreat centers/retreat programs.) (She bakes. She cooks. She hosts. She writes. She LEADS.) She wanted to be friends with me? 

We've been at it for awhile now, (lunching and friending, that is) and I'm still in a bit of awe. SO much wisdom. So many life experiences. Incredible amount of grace. Unbelievably generous. And the best part? Wonderfully practical. 

For instance, last February we were having lunch and I was beating myself up (figuratively) about my delay in getting blood tests done. (My doc had called me on December 31 to let me know he'd been thinking of me. He checked my files and saw that we hadn't checked my blood sugars in awhile ... so he emailed a requisition for me to get that done asap. And here we were, at the end of February, and I still hadn't done it. Mostly because I like getting A's on my report card, and I just knew I was gonna fail.)

So while I'm telling her my game plan (get my mouth surgically sewn shut for a couple months so I don't eat sugar) she interrupts me and suggests, "Just get the blood tests done. If your numbers are out of control, your doctor will know what to do. Likely put you on a pill. And then your numbers will fall back into the healthy zone and you can stop worrying." 

You think? 

Yes. She thought. And it was a good solution to my ridiculous response to a looming blood test. It was the practical, adult, wise thing to do. So I did it the next day. I'm grateful for her no-nonsense approach to life. "Just get er done."

Anyway - 

After we've visited for an hour or two, I leave feeling heard, feeling understood, feeling wiser, feeling hope-filled. 

So with that said, this is Wendy. She's a smart cookie. And I'm grateful she made sure our paths crossed all those years ago. 

She is many things. But if I had to sum it up with one word, I'd say she is a leader. And I'm a better person having been led by her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi Wendy, what would you tell your younger self and really hope she understands?

I was 35 when I got married and I had thought for a long time that this would be the culmination of all my dreams and desires. At one level, part of me knew better. And I had reached a point in life where singleness had stared me down and made me ask, “what if this is it?”  And I had begun to think about what I wanted and needed to be OK with that. What did it mean to be a woman if I was never in a romantic relationship? Could I/should I become a parent if it was to be a single parent? How do I take seriously the Bible’s teaching that singles can serve the Lord wholeheartedly in their state?

In the end, that was not my road to take after all. But if I would go back, I think I would like to have started that conversation with myself (and with God) sooner.

I think that the sooner and better answers I found to those questions, would have made me a better wife, mom, servant of God and friend to others.

 

1.      What makes your life meaningful?

Knowing/believing that I am using the gifts God has given me to make a difference…in my home, in my work, in my friendships. I “discovered” my spiritual gifts when I was in university (TWU) and knowing this has shaped my whole life, literally. I have had opportunities to use them in different contexts and in different ways and I think there has been growth in their manifestation but that is the central thing that I feel has made my life meaningful.

1.      Who has inspired/mentored you?

I have had some amazing opportunities to be inspired by people, mostly people who probably never knew they were inspiring me. One of my graduate school professors, a woman, was the reason I went back to school for a 2^nd Masters degree…not so much because I needed another degree but because I wanted a female mentor.  

Early in my career at Focus I had opportunity to spend time with Pete Scazzero, whose life and ministry was very inspiring to me…emotionally healthy spirituality…lived out in his life and in his church. Authentic, genuine, real. That is inspiring to me.

And the leadership team we had gathered at Focus a few years ago was an inspiration to me…men and women committed to God, to one another and to the work they were called to. 

1.      What are you looking forward to?

I have to say that I am very much looking forward to retirement next spring!  I have recently become a grandmother, so I look forward to investing time in the next generation. I look forward to greater freedom to set my own schedule and find new ways and places to use my gifts and seriously to just REST for a season because I am quite drained.

1.      What is the best thing about being your current age?

I feel less of a need to prove myself at this age (64). I am okay with who I am, can point to a handful of achievements, including a family that I get to love, a job I hope to leave in good hands and reasonably good health to hopefully enjoy my next season of life. 

1.      What is your greatest fear?

There’s a number of things, but the one that comes first to mind is that I am not a fan of physical pain…I don’t think I would cope well at all with the chronic pain I know some people live with. 

1.      Can you share three major highlights you’ve experienced so far?

Having our first daughter was a huge highlight for me!  Adopting our second daughter was also a major highlight; the journey was documented in a documentary TV series that got us recognized across North America for several years! LOL! Recently welcoming our first granddaughter would have to be the third.

Have you had a life-changing event? What did you learn from it?

 I had a very challenging year shortly after turning thirty. A couple of disappointing revelations, an attempt to process them in counselling that was totally ineffective, led to a season of insecurity and less-than-stellar decisions that ultimately resulted in a significant career change. I learned that, as self-sufficient as I strove to be (and took pride in being) ,that I needed others and I needed to learn to ask for what I needed and find the right people to help me get my (legitimate) needs met.

9.      Any thoughts on beauty?

Yes, I’d love to have some! LOL!  Seriously, one thing I have learned is that inward beauty is more significant and lasting than outward beauty. I think beauty is very subjective and what is important is to make the most of what we have externally but put our greatest emphasis on being internally beautiful people: kind, compassionate, forgiving, interested, unselfish, generous, etc.

9.      General wisdom, on any topic, you’d like to pass along to younger women? (Finances, faith, aging, relationships, cleaning, self-care, health, diet, travel, career…)?

Education is an investment worth making, not just to get a degree but to be in an amazing context for life learning.

Cultivate friendships, be a friend, maintain friendships, be discerning about friendships, invest in friendships, enjoy friendships.

God made us for a purpose; find your purpose and live it out…it is the path to fulfillment.

What is your favorite/most memorable/impactful:

- book

Habakkuk

- movie/show

I’m a fan of Star Wars and Avengers movies 

- song

Hymns in general, lots of favourites, if I have to pick one: Great is Thy Faithfulness 

- city you’ve lived in/visited

We loved visiting Savannah, Georgia

- verse or quote

Nehemiah 6:8   “None of these things you are saying are true; you’ve made them up out of your own head!”   LOL!

Seriously, I love John 17, where Jesus prays for us!

- activity that brings joy

I love live theatre (musical or otherwise) 

- surprising moment

My daughter as a teenager gave me a box full of slips of paper with things she admires/appreciates about me…such a treasured possession!

- favorite flower

Lilacs

- favorite snack

Too many, but Purdy’s chocolate covered cherries are a weakness 

- favorite Christmas memory

My brother bought me a mop (my request) when I got my first apartment and he dressed it up as a maid! 😊 It was hilarious!

Thanks, Wendy

xo

Road Trippin'

 "Hey. Are you still interested in seeing the Passion Play?" she asked.

"Uhh. Yeah, sure." I replied.

We left 48 hours later.

First night in Golden. 

Then Drumheller.

Back to Nelson. 

And, 2200 kms later, home. 

I'm still not operating on all cylinders, so she planned the route, made the reservations, brought a couple coolers filled with food and did half the driving. 

Mitzi was our reliable steed. 

There were warm weather warnings in every city we passed through. But it's summer; this is expected temperature behavior, yes? 

My eye balls were in awe of the beauty. Canola fields? YOU ARE STUNNING. Field? You are the cutest little town. Yoho Park? How come I've never heard of you before? DRUMHELLER!! You are a DELIGHT!

Mitzi, ready to roll. New windshield. Freshly cleaned. All ready for a million bugs to get splatted all over the front of her. 

The mountains. 

Majestic and glorious as anticipated. 

We stopped at the Natural Bridge (and just about any other photo-worthy spot along the way) on that first day. 

"A ribbon of steel ..." 

I love that phrase. It describes the railway that connected the east to the west ...

The last spike was placed/pounded in on Nov 7, 1885.

(Which, after travelling in Europe last year, is a reminder of how very young Canada is.)

My travelling buddy had salad fixin's in one of her coolers. (I had popcorn and chips in mine.) So we stopped for a picnic lunch beside a lake that I've forgotten the name of. And we ate her healthy things. (Which she swooned over, and I tolerated. Hahaha.)

If you're gonna road trip with someone, choose someone who brings two of everything plus a little extra, "just in case"...

We drove through Field, a teensy town in BC, (population 169) that is SO so adorable:

I would estimate at least 1/3 of the homes in Field are guest houses. And on that day in July there were NO vacancies. Unbelievably picturesque. I took 10,000 photos. And will delete 9,990 of them. Because really? The internet has photos too. 

After spending the night in Golden, BC, we continued on, crossing the border into Alberta. First time for Mitz. She loved it. 

Europe may have it's fancy, old castles, but we have that hotel in Banff. :)

And then, just like that, (snaps fingers) we were out of the mountains and into unfamiliar territory. FLAT. 

FLAT FOREVER.

Not a hill or a bump to be seen for a million miles. 

At 9 pm we checked out the hoodoos:

If it hadn't been getting dark, I would've stayed another hour. 

JUST loved watching the shadows play across the grooves, bulges and rolls. 

(Haha, sounds like I'm describing my stomach.)

Watching the kids scramble across the rocks (and hearing their moms shout at them to be careful, or come down now), made me nostalgic for those long-ago golden years of family adventures with my Oboys.  

(Sandra needing to touch to experience what it feels like.)

This (below) is my fav pic. Looks like a smiling mouth with bad teeth, yes?

 

So. That was worth the drive. 

The next morning we climbed 106 steps to get up and into the mouth of the world's largest dinosaur. (I have a faulty hip. And she has knee issues.)

You just wish you were on this road trip with us, don't you?

Right?!

How could we not?

After that invigorating start to our day, we drove the 48k Dinosaur Loop (or something. I can't remember what it was called.)  

We stopped at all the Points Of Interest.

At times it felt like we were driving through a live Ukranian flag. The blue sky and yellow canola fields are really a site to behold. Nothing prepares you for the vastness and colour intensity of both. We kept pulling off to the side to take one more photo. 

And then we descended from the plateau into a coulee and took a cable-pulled ferry across the river. 

... and arrived on the other side, just to ascend to another plateau. Where we stopped to watch gophers yell at us at Horse Thief Canyon. 

It was windy.

On our way to the museum, we paused for a minute to check out this tiny roadside chapel. I thought it was where Daryl proposed to Julie.

I was wrong. (That happened at the roadside chapel in farther south. WHO KNEW there would be so many teensy places of worship in this province? I don't think BC has any. 

And then?

THIS.

The Royal (because Queen Elizabeth visited) Tyrell Museum:

Check the link for more info and better photos. 

I never knew.

I didn't realize dinosaurs were REAL. 

HAha. Thought they were just a Jurassic Park/Land Before Time thing. 

That's embarrassing to admit. But look at me being all transparent about my blonde brain. 

These are REAL bones. Found all over the Alberta Badlands. Dinosaurs not only roamed the earth, they did it IN CANADA. Mind blown. 

That museum is world-famous. So you should take your young paleontologists to see it. Or not. It's really up to you. Don't come to me for travel or parenting tips. 

After that, we drove over The Eleven Bridges to Wayne. ( A Guinness Book of World Records item: 11 bridges in 6 kms.) And stopped in Wayne to take a quick look at The Last Chance Saloon where Jackie Chan filmed a scene for Shanghai Noon. 

AND THEN.

Then we met up with Mandi and watched The Passion Play at the Drumheller Amphitheatre. People come from all over the world to see this... (three weekends in July only).

Badlands Passion Play

I would recommend seeing this production. 

It's impressive. Grand. 

They make use of the whole valley, not just the stage... actors are on the mountain tops in the distance, and the ridges and caves and... I've never experienced anything like it before. 

The actors, singers, musicians are all professional. 

And the story, well, it's timeless. 

We are loved. 

And meeting Jesus will change us forever. 

And then it was time to head home. 

We stopped at Lenbrick Falls (where Greg and Mandi got married).

Julie suggested we stop at Frank's Slide Interpretive Centre to get the deets on the 1903 rock slide that wiped out a good portion of the town of Frank. So we did. 

That mountain fell apart and within 90 seconds ten katrillion pounds of rocks (some the size of houses) tumbled down the mountain, across the valley and up the other side. At least 90 people were crushed. 

So humbling, isn't it?

To see the power of rolling stones. The damage it can cause. The lives that're lost. 

This whole trip has been humbling. Everything is SO BIG. From the sky to the fields to the mountains to the God-story to the lakes to the rock slides. 

And I am so small. 

It just catches your breath. 

We thought our last stop was going to be Nelson, but after checking in at the Tourist Bureau for recommendations on must-see sites, we were directed to Kaslo. Haha. 

Which was lovely, because my grannie's sister lived and raised her family there. She owned the theatre, clothing store and arcade. So that was a teensy trip down memory lane. ('Cept I have no memories of this lane.)

We took Hwy 5 to Alberta. 

Then from Hwy 22 (the prettiest road. You should take it if you can) we headed west back home on Hwy 3, (Crows Nest Hwy.)

This mountain, (below) is Crow's Nest:

In Kaslo we toured the SS Moyie (museum) (which I found interesting) :

(for more info: SS Moyie )

And our last tourist activity was riding the tram in Nelson...

(The following pics are out of order, and I can't adjust them. Sorry to the editor-types who're reading. This'll probably make your eye twitch.)

Had an ice cream at this old school DQ (the last independent one NOT owned the Orange Julius people) and apparently the only one that doesn't accept tips. 

Three things I'm thankful for:

1. A travelling companion who did all the heavy lifting (not literally, but mentally) to make this trip happen. 

2. No mishaps or accidents or situations we couldn't handle. 

3. That two old ladies can drive a car across the Rockies and through the Prairies and feel totally safe doing so. So grateful that I live in this time and in this country.

4. The creativity of our God who had so many good ideas about landscapes and colours.

Have a good summer, feel your boobs, drink more water, xo