Monday, April 4, 2005

More dumb thoughts

The Pope died.
I had been thinking about him a lot when I was in Europe, what with going through one Catholic cathedral after another, day in, day out, it was hard not to think of the guy in charge …
(And by the way, those cathedrals were breathtakingly beautiful yet cold and drafty. Impersonal in most cases. Jus saying.)

According to the news, he died according to his wishes (as recorded sometime in ’96 or something) in God’s perfect timing.

Naturally, this has me (and no doubt the rest of North America) comparing his passing with Terry S’s.
How come her passing had to be surrounded with controversy? Where her wishes not clear enough? Was God’s timing imperfect?

When is someone dead?
What makes a person ‘no longer alive’?
Who decides?
Doctors? Lawyers? Loved ones? Funeral directors?

Is the need for a feeding tube the definitive sign that someone can no longer survive without medical intervention?

There was a story in the People magazine (SHUT UP) about a woman who had been in a coma for 20 years. TWENTY YEARS.
She ‘woke up’ last month, much to her mom’s delight.
It is doubtful she will ever leave the nursing home where she has lain for most of her life – but she is clearly alive.
I’m guessing she musta had a feeding tube. And catheter.

One of my colleagues at work has a cousin who is just coming out of a 6 month coma.

What would my wishes be?
Like the pope, I think I should put them into writing so that those who love me don’t have to make a decision that causes angst and pain.
But what are my wishes?

I guess at this point I hope that God is very clear when He wants me to come home. When my time on earth is up, I hope it’s definitive. The last thing I want is for my parents or kids to have to debate life support, feeding tubes, coma-length, nursing homes, etc.

Whoa. Wasn’t this a cheery post?
My ear is still plugged, and the pressure is starting to pound in my jaw. Feels like I’ve had some root canal work done.
Plus, I’m missing Drew. Haven’t seen him since March 10 and my arms are aching for a hug.
Next post will be more positive. I’ll try to have the keyboard handy after I take a couple painkillers.

Three things I’m thankful for:
1. My dad put something on my front lawn. It’s green. Yay.
2. Twenty two hours til Drew’s plane arrives.
3. Clint and Max helped me in the yard tonight. We pulled out 4 bags of weeds before it got too dark to see. There’s something about having your kids help with the yard work that just feels special. I guess I felt loved tonight. That’s always a good thing.

Take care,

1 comment:

Christine said...

Your wisdom is great. You admit you don't have all the answers tied up with bows. I too hope and pray my "going home" is not confusing to my loved ones. But we can take heart that we will all pass through that valley. Whatever way it comes, we will breath our last. And then what? For myself, I can hardly wait some days -- to get home. But while here, I'm like you. Love the green lawns, the flowers, the pussy-cats and children. Love my friends and Jenn's new word -- a Buckies. Hope the ear-ache clears up soon.

PS -- I thought the Pope was a lovely man. Such a gentle, humble Christian. A good example.