Monday, January 5, 2015

Crash and Pray

Me: I can't think of a single reason to get out of bed.
Her: I'm not doing great either.

(Texting with a friend at noon.)

It's that time of year. It's dark even before your stomach gets hungry for supper. And the days are grey. And drippy. Drippy like a faucet on full blast.
I have a cold/flu/something that makes me ache.
And the spurs on my right foot are multiplying and growing.

I left the lake at 2 on Dec 31 and went straight to bed when I got back to Surrey.
Stayed in bed for the whole day on Jan 1.
Got out of bed for my mom's party on Jan 2, then went collapsed again once it was over.
Took back the rentals at 1 pm on Jan 3, and was back in bed an hour later.
And today, Jan 4? Couldn't think of a reason to get up.

When the January blues hit, they pack a punch.
Or maybe I really do have some sort of bug?

When I did finally decide it was time to shower, I crumpled when I put weight on my right foot. The pain? Was 10/10.

So, OK, fine.
I'm not going to be moving around today. I'll just stay in bed.
And nose around Facebook, read blogs, check my twitter feeds, scroll through Instagram,  pray.

(Did you ever read Francine Rivers' Mark of the Lion series?
I was reminded of Marcus and Julia's mom in book 2, where she is bedridden because of a stroke-like ailment because God wanted her to stop being busy and simply pray for her kids.)

So there's me. In my bed. A heroine, just like in a novel, praying for my kids who are all in separate vehicles, driving through a snowstorm on the Coquihalla, coming home from a week of boarding at SunPeaks.

I had heard about the snow warning on Sat evening at about 7 pm and had been pestering God about my kids' safety all evening, Then I saw a comment that Danica wrote on one of her Instagram pics before I went to sleep:

We were planning on staying for the day, but a crazy snow storm is headed for this area and the Coquihalla so we're leaving asap.

so I prayed some more.

And then I got a text from her at noon today, shortly after they left the mountain:

and I kinda forgot about my foot and my achy bones and I just kept praying.

Dear God. 

I love them. 
Keep them safe.
Protect them from accidents.
Keep them alert.
Please give them the intelligence to not race home, seeing who does the best time. 
Please give them the desire to stick together on the Hwy, so that no one gets left behind. 
Please set your angels on their roof tops.

(And then like shampoo instructions, I'd rinse and repeat:)

I love them. 
Keep them safe.
Protect them from accidents.
Keep them alert.
Please give them the intelligence to not race home, seeing who does the best time. 
Please give them the desire to stick together on the Hwy, so that no one gets left behind. 
Please set your angels on their roof tops.

And then? I added, "Your will be done", because I realized it might be His will that not everyone make it home safely. Maybe He had a purpose in allowing someone to run into trouble? Maybe He had a plan, and part of that plan involved something that would scare me?

Dear God, 

My kids are on the Coq driving through the middle of a snowstorm. I've done that before, a couple of times, and it's scary. You probably remember. I prayed for Help for 7 solid hours through white out conditions that time in 2001. I am afraid for my kids right now. Do they have enough driving experience to handle the challenge? How many other drivers on the road will there be? It's the day that most everyone will be travelling back to the lower mainland... please protect that highway from bad things happening. God I pray that my kids will rely on you. That they will ask for help when things get scary. 

God, please bring them all home safe. 
Please protect them from accidents.

But, if an accident is part of Your plan for one of my kids, then I pray Your will be done. Use that accident for your purposes. Your glory. And give me peace about it. I know You love them even more than I do. And I feel so useless here in my bed. So. Creator of the Universe - Your will be done on that highway this afternoon. My kids are in Your hands. 


By 4 pm, I'd heard from Drew and Danica, They were back in Langley, safe.
At 5 pm I touched base with Max, who was back in New West.

No one had heard from or seen Clint. They'd gotten separated sometime in the afternoon when they'd done a gas/food stop.

And then at 5:30, Drew called:

Me: Hi sweets. Feel good to be home?
Drew: Have you talked to Max or Clint yet?
Me: Just Max. He's going to a meeting tonight. Taylor's cake.
Drew: Clint's been in an accident. He's OK but the truck is totalled.
Me: He's OK? You're sure?
Drew: Yes. He's fine. It was a 4 car pile up and three of the cars were written off, and people were taken to the hospital by ambulance...
Me: He's definitely OK?
Drew: Yes, but don't phone him. He'll call you when he can.
Me: Where is he now?
Drew: He is driving someone else's SUV from the accident site to the Hope Hospital. Dad was behind him by a few minutes so he was there at the accident scene. He'll bring Clint home from the hospital.
Me: Uh ok
Drew: He's fine. OK?

We hung up and I started to cry.
Big ugly tears.

Thank you. 
Thank you for keeping him safe. 
Thank you that Mark was right behind him. 
Thank you that no one died. 
Thank you,
Thank you,
Thank you.

After crying for awhile I called Drew back:

Me: OK. Can you tell me everything again?
Drew: OK. Clint is fine. He hit black ice and started to spin. Then ...

... and he very patiently went over everything with me again.

About half an hour later, Clint called. He was in Mark's truck and they were leaving Hope.

" ... I hit the black ice and knew it was going to be bad. I lost control right at the start of the barrier and almost went over because we were at the bridge. It's the closest I've ever come to dyin'. Then a 4x4 SUV behind me hit the ice and lost control and hit me. And then a third 4x4 SUV hit the ice and started spinning and hit us all. The driver of the second vehicle got out of his truck to see if the driver in the third truck was OK, but then a mini van hit the ice and ran straight into him and the rest of us. I called 911. Dad showed up about half an hour later...he was behind me.

Three of the vehicles were write offs, but one of the SUV's was still driveable. The owner was taken to Hope Hospital in an ambulance, so I said I'd drive it to the hospital for him. One of the other drivers got a ride with me. Dad picked us both up in Hope and is driving us to Vancouver. She lives in Kits.  I'm fine. Totally fine."

I hung up and cried again. Then called him back and asked him to repeat everything. Just because. Because I needed to hear his voice. And I needed to hear the details again.

I warned him his body might start shaking, and there was a chance he would feel emotional. Delayed shock. He messaged me when he got home:

This is the tow truck driver he got to know ... apparently he's famous. (From the show "Highway From Hell")

I am so thankful that Clint was in my dad's truck, which is a tank.
When you compare photos of all the damage done to all the vehicles, the other front ends all crumpled. Dad's truck? Twisted frame but nothing fell apart.

I am extra thankful that Mark was behind Clint on the highway. Thankful that he had time and space to help with transportation needs.

I am thankful for all the friends who joined me in praying (via a facebook status update) for my kids this afternoon.

And I'm thankful that God's will was done. I will never know why He allowed the accident to happen. And it doesn't matter.

It is hard being the mom to grown sons.
I wanted them all to come home to me.
I wished I could've hugged them, fed them, heard their stories, and had them fall asleep under my roof.

Those days are so over.
I am a bystander in their lives at this stage.
Will I ever get used to that?

Whoa. Winter. I need you to end already.
WHAT? You've only been around for 13 days? Seriously?
Man. I gotta get more Vitamin D. And plan a vacation.

Three things I'm thankful for:
1. They are all home.
2. They are all home.
3. They are all home.



Tricia said...

So thankful Clint is ok...praying not too many years were shaved off your life, by this. ( I deal with stress with lame attempts at humor)

Kim N. said...

Oh, you must be exhausted from all of that prayer and emotion. I'm so glad the boys are all safe and sound and that nobody died in that mess. Hang in there...Spring is coming.