Wednesday, October 3, 2018


I started writing down my Please God's and Thank You God's in this note book in Sept 2016. Prior to this I didn't have a prayer journal.

I didn't want to have a record of all my unanswered prayers. I assumed it would make me bitter. I was worried that if I had a master list of all my requests where God said No, or Wait (and really, what's the difference No and Wait if "Wait" means not now, and maybe not in your lifetime...) that I'd have a crisis of faith. Be disappointed in God. Not bother praying ever again.

Haha. So it was better have no real expectations for answered prayer than to have evidence of unmet expectations.
How wacked is that?

So in a moment of optimism two years ago, I thought, "Meh. Maybe I'll be surprised at how I'll see the hand of God at work if I keep track of our conversations."

So I wrote out my prayers. In detail.
Probably too much detail.
Way too transparent and raw, really.

While I was in Palm Desert with Julie last week, I filled up the last pages. That book is now done.
I spent a couple afternoons, floating in the pool, re-reading two years' worth of pleading and thanking.

It's hard to say how many prayers were answered, as alot of them weren't measurable. Like, please, I need wisdom. Or please, strengthen their marriage. Or please, could you do something about the pain she's in.
(I consider a measurable prayer to be very specific with definite results, like: "Dear God, Please can You arrange for me find a ticket to Palm Springs for less than $200 return. I will know it's a sign from You that I should go if I can get a cheap ticket." Or, "Dear God. Max needs to pass his final exam. Please help him study and learn and know the things he needs to in order to do well on this last test of the semester.")

(By the way, both of those prayers were answered positively.)

I noticed that most of my prayers, at the front end of the book, were uh, specific, according to my understanding of the situation. However by the time two years had passed I acknowledged that God was able to do far more than I could ask for OR IMAGINE, so I changed my prayers considerably. "Dear God. This is the situation. I would love it if You could intervene and do THIS, but maybe You've got a better idea? You see a bigger picture and understand all the intricacies of the problem. So I'll leave this with You and trust You've got a creative plan that is far superior to one that I could ask for or imagine. Your will be done, God. Have at 'er."

Some prayer requests show up on every page. Every Single Time I wrote, there it was again. Over and over, the same thing. I really hope He's OK listening to me go on and on about the never-ending longings of my heart and those deep desires of my soul. I'm trusting He loves me enough to listen. And not be bored.

(I'm also trusting He's on the move, in stealth mode. If He's only got so much time in a day, He doesn't have to waste it re-assuring me, Ima gonna trust He's way ahead of me on it. In fact, I'm going to assume He was on it, EVEN BEFORE I ASKED.)

Now that the book is full, I'm getting rid of it. It'll either get ripped up and placed in with the kitchen garbage, or burnt, one page at a time, at a campfire at the lake. Or I'll shred it at work.

I'm starting a new one.
Prayer Journal.
This one will be different than the last one.

My Aunt Agatha's Prayer Pages inspired me. (When reading her Bible, if she'd find a passage that applied to one of her kids/grandkids/greatgrandkids, she'd pray those words for that family member, and write it down. When her kids found those pages after she'd died, they were blessed.)

I'd rather have my kids be blessed if they find my prayer journal, than embarrassed. Haha. This pink flowered one? Is too much.

Do you journal your prayers?
Tell me about it. What works for you?

Three Things I'm Thankful For:

1. Three blog posts in three days. A record for me this year. Grateful for the time and space to write again.
2. New babies. They're so tiny. And precious. And full of potential.
3. Creative people.


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