We'd worked together for a number of years, but she was a Senior Vice President, (way up high on our org chart) and worked on a different floor than I did, (first floor, so way down low in the building) ... our paths didn't cross often.
Until.
Until one day, a few years ago, she invited me to lunch. She intentionally removed the high and low barriers and said, "I'd like for us to be friends."
Say wut?
I was completely intimidated by this woman. (She led the counselling team/department AND was the leader of our retreat centers/retreat programs.) (She bakes. She cooks. She hosts. She writes. She LEADS.) She wanted to be friends with me?
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We've been at it for awhile now, (lunching and friending, that is) and I'm still in a bit of awe. SO much wisdom. So many life experiences. Incredible amount of grace. Unbelievably generous. And the best part? Wonderfully practical.
For instance, last February we were having lunch and I was beating myself up (figuratively) about my delay in getting blood tests done. (My doc had called me on December 31 to let me know he'd been thinking of me. He checked my files and saw that we hadn't checked my blood sugars in awhile ... so he emailed a requisition for me to get that done asap. And here we were, at the end of February, and I still hadn't done it. Mostly because I like getting A's on my report card, and I just knew I was gonna fail.)
So while I'm telling her my game plan (get my mouth surgically sewn shut for a couple months so I don't eat sugar) she interrupts me and suggests, "Just get the blood tests done. If your numbers are out of control, your doctor will know what to do. Likely put you on a pill. And then your numbers will fall back into the healthy zone and you can stop worrying."
You think?
Yes. She thought. And it was a good solution to my ridiculous response to a looming blood test. It was the practical, adult, wise thing to do. So I did it the next day. I'm grateful for her no-nonsense approach to life. "Just get er done."
Anyway -
After we've visited for an hour or two, I leave feeling heard, feeling understood, feeling wiser, feeling hope-filled.
So with that said, this is Wendy. She's a smart cookie. And I'm grateful she made sure our paths crossed all those years ago.
She is many things. But if I had to sum it up with one word, I'd say she is a leader. And I'm a better person having been led by her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hi Wendy, what would you tell your younger self and really hope she understands?
I
was 35 when I got married and I had thought for a long time that this would be
the culmination of all my dreams and desires. At one level, part of me knew
better. And I had reached a point in life where singleness had stared me down
and made me ask, “what if this is it?” And
I had begun to think about what I wanted and needed to be OK with that. What
did it mean to be a woman if I was never in a romantic relationship? Could
I/should I become a parent if it was to be a single parent? How do I take
seriously the Bible’s teaching that singles can serve the Lord wholeheartedly
in their state?
In
the end, that was not my road to take after all. But if I would go back, I
think I would like to have started that conversation with myself (and with God)
sooner.
I
think that the sooner and better answers I found to those questions, would have
made me a better wife, mom, servant of God and friend to others.
1. What makes your life meaningful?
Knowing/believing
that I am using the gifts God has given me to make a difference…in my home, in
my work, in my friendships. I “discovered” my spiritual gifts when I was in
university (TWU) and knowing this has shaped my whole life, literally. I have had
opportunities to use them in different contexts and in different ways and I
think there has been growth in their manifestation but that is the central thing
that I feel has made my life meaningful.
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1.
Who
has inspired/mentored you?
I
have had some amazing opportunities to be inspired by people, mostly people who
probably never knew they were inspiring me. One of my graduate school
professors, a woman, was the reason I went back to school for a 2nd
Masters degree…not so much because I needed another degree but because I wanted
a female mentor.
Early
in my career at Focus I had opportunity to spend time with Pete Scazzero, whose
life and ministry was very inspiring to me…emotionally healthy
spirituality…lived out in his life and in his church. Authentic, genuine, real.
That is inspiring to me.
And
the leadership team we had gathered at Focus a few years ago was an inspiration
to me…men and women committed to God, to one another and to the work they were
called to.
1.
What
are you looking forward to?
I
have to say that I am very much looking forward to retirement next spring! I have recently become a grandmother, so I
look forward to investing time in the next generation. I look forward to
greater freedom to set my own schedule and find new ways and places to use my
gifts and seriously to just REST for a season because I am quite drained.
1.
What
is the best thing about being your current age?
I
feel less of a need to prove myself at this age (64). I am okay with who I am,
can point to a handful of achievements, including a family that I get to love,
a job I hope to leave in good hands and reasonably good health to hopefully
enjoy my next season of life.
1.
What
is your greatest fear?
There’s
a number of things, but the one that comes first to mind is that I am not a fan
of physical pain…I don’t think I would cope well at all with the chronic pain I
know some people live with.
1.
Can
you share three major highlights you’ve experienced so far?
Having
our first daughter was a huge highlight for me!
Adopting our second daughter was also a major highlight; the journey was
documented in a documentary TV series that got us recognized across North
America for several years! LOL! Recently welcoming our first granddaughter
would have to be the third.
Have
you had a life-changing event? What did you learn from it?
9.
Any
thoughts on beauty?
Yes,
I’d love to have some! LOL! Seriously,
one thing I have learned is that inward beauty is more significant and lasting
than outward beauty. I think beauty is very subjective and what is important is
to make the most of what we have externally but put our greatest emphasis on
being internally beautiful people: kind, compassionate, forgiving, interested, unselfish,
generous, etc.
9. General wisdom, on any topic, you’d like to pass along to younger women? (Finances, faith, aging, relationships, cleaning, self-care, health, diet, travel, career…)?
Education
is an investment worth making, not just to get a degree but to be in an amazing
context for life learning.
Cultivate
friendships, be a friend, maintain friendships, be discerning about
friendships, invest in friendships, enjoy friendships.
God
made us for a purpose; find your purpose and live it out…it is the path to
fulfillment.
What is your favorite/most memorable/impactful:
-
book
Habakkuk
-
movie/show
I’m a fan of Star Wars and Avengers movies
-
song
Hymns in general, lots of favourites, if I have to pick one: Great is Thy Faithfulness
-
city you’ve lived in/visited
We loved visiting Savannah, Georgia
-
verse or quote
Nehemiah
6:8 “None of these things you are
saying are true; you’ve made them up out of your own head!” LOL!
Seriously, I love John 17, where Jesus prays for us!
-
activity that brings joy
I love live theatre (musical or otherwise)
-
surprising moment
My daughter as a teenager gave me a box full of slips of paper with things she admires/appreciates about me…such a treasured possession!
-
favorite flower
Lilacs
-
favorite snack
Too many, but Purdy’s chocolate covered cherries are a weakness
-
favorite Christmas memory
My brother bought me a mop (my request) when I got my first apartment and he dressed it up as a maid! 😊 It was hilarious!
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