Wednesday, April 25, 2007


I was not going to write about this because it would sound like I’m whining. And I’m not. Really I’m not. I’m looking forward to it, I think it will be a lot of fun. So, don’t for a minute think I’m complaining. Because I’m not.

When I first offered to host the April ladies event, I assumed it would be like the others; roughly 20 women from the church, getting together for an evening of visiting. (Or “an evening of fellowship” as they say in Christian circles.) (Does anyone else ever use that word? Did Christians shoddy it, so now it’s theirs? What are other Christian words? This reminds me of a phone call I got at work last week. It was from the owner of a Christian stock photography website. He encouraged me to consider purchasing Christian photos from him for use in our brochures and ads. He name-dropped all the big faith-based organizations and said they all buy from him. Intrigued as to what a Christian photo looks like I checked out his web site. Interesting. He had Christian photos of Christian trees, Christian flowers, Christian blades of grass, Christian streams, Christian creeks. They looked surprisingly like regular nature pics.) Sometimes its just plain old embarrassing to be a Christian … we can be so pretentious at times.

So, yes, back to the original story. Way back at the beginning of March when I said sure, yes, I gladly plan an event for April, I didn’t realize a few things:

1. My wonky knee and spastic hip would become enraged at the slightest bit of movement.

2. That it would take 17 days and 439 e-mails before a date could be agreed upon.

3. That the date that worked absolutely best for everyone including the Pope and the President of Cambodia, is quite positively (work-wise) the worst day for me.

4. That the kids’ dad and step mom would be in Europe this week and next, meaning; no carpooling help and no evenings “off”.

5. That the weekend before the shower, I would be at an all-afternoon-and evening wedding on the Saturday. And because of the afore-mentioned issues with my lower limbs, I decided against the wearing of the dress and heels I bought in Arizona for the wedding. (Well that, and I bought the dress knowing I’d need to buy a full-body girdle to go with it, and I just couldn’t see that happening.) So, on the Friday night of the weekend before the April event that I was planning, I went to the mall to pick up an outfit. And buy a wedding gift for Rachel. And a shower gift for Shari’s Sunday afternoon shower. I arrived at Willowbrook at 8:00 pm and it took me 20 minutes to waddle from the parking lot to the fat ladies department. I shopped for 15 minutes and bought 7 items all ridiculously priced. (As in cheap. Steals.) Stopped at the gift registry to see what I could buy for the brides, then realized I better start limping back out to my truck before they’d lock me in. I went to the wedding giftless. When Rachel visited with me after most of her other guests had left the reception, I told her I had a whack of cash for her (one of Raych’s blog readers sent me money to buy something for her…) did she want to take it along on her honeymoon? Or would she like Seasons 1 and 2 of The Office on DVD along with a gift card for the 3rd Season? Or would she like a gift card to HMV so her and Joel could go nuts getting music CD’s and movie DVD’s? Or would she like a couple folding lawnchairs, beach towels and a Chapter’s gift certificate? Or did she have another idea? She liked the beach chair idea so she can come visit me at Cultus this summer and have something to sit on. And I wasn’t much more creative when it came to the Sunday shower. After walking back and forth through the parking lot at church a few times in the morning, my lower half was finished my noon. The thought of shopping for a gift terrorized me. So, again with the gift card…The heart is willing, but this bloody body is weak. And I am really not complaining. Remember? I made that clear at the start of this post. So with the exhausting weekend I had (physically because of you know – that legs thing, but also because I tried to suck my gut in the whole time. And it was mentally draining because I had to, you know, talk to people. Instead of read blogs. Talking takes SO much more energy. So when I said I’d do the shower in April, I didn’t know how depleted I’d be the weekend before.

6. That there would be more than 20 people there. (20 would have been fit beautifully in my mom’s new living room.) At last count, it looks like we have 40 – 45 ladies/young women/girls joining in to celebrate with the two brides.
That the chairs I would obviously need to borrow would be stored way over there – at that edge of Langley. And would need to be brought way over there – at the tip of Surrey. And that Clint with his pick up truck would have to be the one to do it. And that he would choose to do it on his Monday off. In the latter part of the afternoon. And that he would only be able to fit 28 chairs in his truck at a time. And that he would be on the freeway, heading west at 4 pm on the day that the Canuck’s would be playing game 7 of the first round of playoffs at HOME with a 6 pm game start time. His second trip would be made at 2 am when the traffic was better.

7. That the gift that I would ultimately decide to purchase for both brides would be full-size double burner propane BBQ’s. That came in boxes too big to fit in the back of my truck so I’d have to ask my dad to help me transport them back to Surrey.

8. That this week would be intense for me. That I would be responsible for getting out almost 4,000 pieces of communication. Some by snail mail, some by e-mail. I do not have a team, a partner, or an assistant for most of this. Other than my mom. Again, she put 2000 labels on envelopes for me. Plus, it was determined last week that the best day for everyone would be Wednesday for a data-base meeting and web-site training. Have I mentioned the zit on my forehead? It’s as big as a pea. But not that color. I had a painful one on the bridge of my nose too, but that one is healing. The forehead one is not. Bangs. They are a beautiful thing.

9. That when we decided a fun thing to do at the shower was to have about a dozen of the teenaged girls model some of the ladies’ wedding dresses from the past I forgot that there are no blinds in the house. The girls will be using the masterbedroom and ensuite (about 800 square feet) to get ready. The entire north wall is windowed overlooking the river and has a spectacular view and I doubt anyone would be out there, so maybe it’ll be OK.

10. That 40 – 45 guests would mean I don’t have enough coffee mugs. Or dessert plates. Or forks. So, I’d have to rent them. And pick them up. On Wednesday, after meetings and training and communicating.

11. That Drew would have a big Egypt unit, involving 10 projects to finish up this week.

12. That Drew would need me to get things put together for his Grade 7 ‘grad’ evening by Thursday of this week.

13. That I’d have to spend a day getting Drew’s passport the week before.
That all our paperwork (including medical stuff, like shots?) for Mexico would have to be completed this week. Remember. I am most certainly not whining. I’m just sharing….

14. That I’d determine in my mind that I have to change some things (my food intake, the type of make-up I wear, the amount of sleep I’m getting, my lack of Bible reading, flossing, and bathroom cleaning) in my life and it would all come to a head during this week. The week of the shower.

15. That I’d also plan and be in charge of a Pre-Hi Youth event on Friday of the same week.

16. And I haven’t looked at a calendar, but I have a feeling, in the grand scheme of things, hormonally speaking, this is not the week I should be hanging out with people.

That’s it. Just wanted to let you know what I’m up to. In case, you know, you missed me last night because I didn’t blog …


Tricia said...

You just made me very thankful for my dull and uneventful life :) Seriously, I don't think I could accomplish everything you do. I'll be keeping you in my prayers.

Anonymous said...

Here's the thing. If you accomplish all these things, you will be a superhero. And I'm sure you will accomplish them all so ask your mother to sew you a cape: if you wear it around all week, people will understand that you're a SUPERHERO so they'll tolerate any behavior.
Wow. I'm glad I'm not you this week.
Love September