Let's Do That Again

Have you been to Kits Pool? (Kitsilano Pool)
Oh my goodness, so BIG. So perfect. So summer.

At 137 meters (150 yards), it’s Canada’s longest pool—almost three times longer than an Olympic pool—and Vancouver’s only heated salt water pool.

With its white bottom and turquoise water and its spectacular views--of the ocean, the mountains, Kits Beach, and the skyline of Vancouver’s West End, glittering across English Bay--Kits Pool is a vacation destination unto itself, and just stepping through the gates feels like an escape.

I didn't swim, exactly, but I did go in up to my neck to cool off.

It was heavenly.

Mostly I just sat on my lawnchair and read. 

Well maybe I did a little people-watching. OK. Alot of people-watching. And you know what? I used to think that guys' swim wear consisted of two choices: long, baggy boarding shorts or speedos. 

This is no longer true. 

Oh my goodness no.

Did you notice what the male swimmers were wearing at the Olympics? Well, they're wearing those tight (think male boxer-briefs) suits at Kits Pool too. In varying leg lengths. Some came down to the knee. Others, mid-thigh, and still others that barely covered anything. 

Interesting. 

This was a perfect summer day. 

Three FIVE things I'm thankful for:

1. Friends who take Friday afternoons off work.

2. Lebanese food for supper.

3. Riveting books/creative authors.

4. Sunshine.  

5. Lawnchairs.

Romans 8:38-39
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38-39
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38-39
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38-39
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38-39
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Another Day.

"Pete Klassen," he says to me as I feed him.
"Yup, you're Pete Klassen," I say in agreement.
"Pete Klassen," he says again.
"My dad is Pete Klassen," I say as I slip a tiny spoonful of thickened cranberry juice into his mouth.
"Pete Klassen," he says again, as he waves away my hand with another spoonful of juice.
"Pete Klassen sure is a handsome guy, eh?" I say as I try my luck giving him a spoonful of thickened chocolate ensure.
"You look good too," he says. Then he turns purple, choking on that half a teaspoon of chocolate 'pudding'.
"Thanks," I reply. "Doug looks good too, don't you think?"
Doug, Dad's tablemate for meals, looks pleased with the compliment.
"Thank you very much for noticing," he responds.
"Pete Klassen," my dad says again. And again, and again. For the entire hour that it takes me to feed him 1/2 cup of juice, 1 cup of pureed borscht, 1/4 cup of pureed nectarines and 1/2 cup of thickened Ensure.

Over and over again, "Pete Klassen."
If his brain is a record album, then the needle got stuck on a scratch, the 'Pete Klassen' scratch.

We went for a walk around the building, checking out the action of each of the four floors.
"I like it when you come to visit me," he says as we make our way past the stinky bunny cages.
"I like visiting you," I say.
"Shuffleboard," he says as we roll past the shuffle board.
"Pussy cat," he says as we roll past a fat cat.
"Birds," as we go past the birds.
"Washroom," he READS on the door as we go past the washrooms next to the conference room. (Seriously? He's reading signs on doors now?)
"What time is it dad?" I ask him.
He looks at his watch. "Just coming up on 6:30 he notes." This still amazes me. He hasn't been able to tell the time for years.
We go for another lap around the main floor, going past the shuffleboard again.
"I think I would like to go home with you," he says.
"I think I would like to go to your place and watch a movie with you," I say. "Should we go up to the third floor?"
"Yes."

Mom has left Dances with Wolves in the DVD player, so I set that up for us.
I recline his wheelchair and put a fluffy pillow behind his head. He kicks off his slippers as I pull up a chair beside him.
"Boy, are they ever in for a big surprise," he says.
"They are?" I ask.
He nods.
He turns to look at me, "Boy, are they ever in for a big surprise," he says again.
"That'll be fun," I guess.
"Boy, are they ever in for a big surprise," he mentions again.
"Hmmm. Do you think they'll like the surprise?" I ask, not having a clue what he's talking about.
He shrugs.
"Boy, are they ever in for a big surprise," he repeats himself.
"A good surprise?"
Just then there's a close up of Kevin Costner on the TV screen.

"That's Kevin Costner," dad says. "He has a good moustache. They cut of MY moustache," he tells me in earnest.
"I know, but you can grow another one," I assure him.
"I want a BIG one," he tells me.
"And a big one you shall have," I say. "You can grow a huge one if you want."
"Boy, are they ever in for a big surprise," he says again.
"Who is? Kevin Costner is in for a big surprise?"
"Boy, are they ever in for a big surprise," he just repeats himself.

On the screen, all of a sudden there is a naked Kevin Costner.
He is caressing his butt. (Poor video of that 20 second scene is here, ignore the commentary.

Dad gazes at the screen and says in German, "He is nude."
Dad is not allowed to be nude. He must be dressed at all times.
Dad's moustache was shaved off.
He eats pureed foods that make him gag and choke.
Even though his brain is broken and the needle gets stuck in a scratch, he knows something is not right in his world.

He stops looking at the TV and looks at me.
"I love you dad," I say.
"I. Love. You. Too." he replies. "Boy, are they ever in for a big surprise."

It's 7 pm and time for me to go.
His care aide comes in and preps him for bed, chatting with him as she straightens the sheets.
"Bye dad," I say.
"Bye," he says back to me. "Boy, are they ever in for a big surprise."

I walk into the hallway and Doug is there, in his wheelchair, waiting for me.
"Is he going to be OK?" he asks. "If you need to give him a shower, you are welcome to use the one in my room. I'll be patrolling the perimeter for the next shift, so I won't be needing it." (He's sundowning again. His room does not have a shower, and there is no perimeter to patrol, just a hallway to roll up and down on.)

"Thanks, Doug, but he's already has his shower today, and he's going to bed now. Thanks for keeping an eye on things."
"You are very welcome, it's my pleasure. Say, can I talk to you about something?"
"Sure."
"As you know, I'm highly trained, but I mostly work with men. I'm not sure what to do about your mother-in-law. Am I expected to handle her? You can appreciate my hesitancy... it's really outside of my area of expertise."
"Oh, that's not a problem at all," I assured him. "I will look after her. Consider it done. She'll be my responsibility this evening."
"Thank you. Thank you very much. I appreciate your support in this matter. I've been worried how to handle her."

I give his shoulder a squeeze and tell him I'm thankful he's around.


Dear God,
Please give everyone in that facility a good, peace-filled rest this evening. Pour wisdom on the nurses, flood the care aids with compassion.

Give my mom the strength to keep on keeping on. And heal her sore and aching arthritic joints so that she feels relief from the neverending pain.

That's all for tonight.
Except thank you. Thank you for creating music. Thank you for knowing that some of us have a hard time saying worshippy things to you... thank you for knowing that music would bypass our brains and allow our hearts to sing words of adoration to you. That was a good idea you had.

How Great is Our God?
Chris on the piano.


Amen.

Three FIVE things I'm thankful for:

1. Drew and his friend Karsten popped in for their second supper around midnight. Yay for having a meal on hand.

2. Forgiveness.

3. Faith that God is Good.

4. My dad loves me and thinks I look good. :)

5. A whole bunch of new music that successfully got transferred from Maureen's computer (thanks, M) to my external hard drive, to my laptop, to my iPhone. Easy Peasy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 6:23

For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Yeah. That's What I Needed

Five of us crossed the line tonight and attended an old-fashioned American fair in that quaint little dutch farming town; Lynden. It felt like stepping back in time.

It was? So awesome.

The reason we went?

This guy:

(Chris Tomlin in case you're not familiar with Christian song artists.)

An evening of singing worship songs with thousands of other hot, sticky, happy people was exactly what I needed.

Three FIVE things I'm thankful for:

1. Warm summer evenings.
2. Singing and swaying with friends.
3. Forgetting everything that's going on around me and just worshipping for 90 minutes.
4. Mini donuts.
5. That sweet girl who's dating my youngest boy.

Shalom,

Psalm 19:14
May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14
May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14
May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14
May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14
May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Up and Down

Due to a request for a third showing, at 8 am, I was up after only 3 hours of sleep.
I rolled out of bed, tidied my room and bathroom, then flopped into my truck just as four vehicles pulled up. FOUR.

I parked across the street from my house and prayed. And read. And tried to stay awake.

They were really inspecting my house this time. Like, for two hours. Seriously. How closely are they looking when it takes over two hours to go through a regular two storey house? They had brought a carpenter/contractor along with them ... to give them ideas on how to renovate my front entrance. They can't deal with the "wasted" space.

My stomach was a mess. I just knew they were finding all the faults my twenty year old house has. We were going to fail this final exam. I hate failing.

I sat there, in that truck, as the day heated up, and overthought everything.

When they left, I heard the realtor say to his clients, "Have a great day, guys," as he walked past me to get into his car. And then I knew. They would not be getting together later to write up an offer. They didn't like my house. It wasn't perfect. Of course, I made it all about me immediately after that. "They don't like me. They think I've got a dirty house. They don't like the way I've decorated. They think I'm stupid because of my asking price. They looked under the kitchen sink and saw the mildew from the leaking pipe. They tried to open the sliding door and discovered it's a beast to move. They saw the dust on the buffet in the dining room. They think both me and my house are ugly."

They drove away, and I re-entered my precious house. I sat down on my couch and realized that God is in charge of this transaction... and when the family that He has chosen walks through the house, it will be a perfect fit. Just like it was for me and my boys seven years ago.

I closed my eyes and opened them up again two hours later.

My mom called. Apparently, the new (holee hannah, how many new ones are we going to have to deal with?) care aide at my dad's nursing home, shaved off his moustache this morning. SHAVED IT RIGHT OFF like it hadn't been on his face for the past 40 years. That moustache? Has been one of his defining features, just like the turquoise rings on his fingers. He? Was devastated. He moaned and wailed for his loss. He mourned and grieved with volume. And then he got very, very angry.

My mom requested that, for everyone's sake, this new care aide not be allowed to interact with him for awhile. She is not to assist him with grooming, or eating, or anything.

She called to let me know that he was grumpy and difficult and sad and my upcoming visit with him could be challenging.

Oh goodie goodie gum drops.

I wrote in my prayer journal: "God? Why? Why this? Do we really need One More Thing to deal with? When we're not there, we are entrusting him to Your care? (Hahaha. Like, as if, when we're there, we don't need your assistance. Oh the cheek.) Couldn't You have prevented this? Oh, I know, what's a few whiskers? God? It just seems like it's one thing after another. I'm tired of the drama. Could You intercede and smooth things over? Is this about us? Do we need to learn to extend grace and forgiveness? Or do we need to speak up and be angry? I never know that right response? Is it time to fight (for his rights)? Or time to speak words of life and grace? I dunno. I dunno. I dunno."

I got ready for a doctor's appointment. Remember last year when I had a bladder infection for 6 months? Well, apparently my physician requested that I see the local Urologist to rule out anything deadly. So, one year later (today) I have my initial appointment. (Pretty sure if I did have bladder cancer, I'd be way dead by now.)

Why do I get worked up about these things?
Probably because my name is Jane.

What would she ask? What would she do? Would I have to get undressed? What do urologists do during appointments?

I was a wreck by the time I presented myself to the front desk. Seriously. Why can't I be chill?

"So, you had alot of infections last year?"
I nod.
"Could they be linked to sexual intercourse?"
"No," I say very decisively.
"No, because of the timing? You didn't immediately experience discomfort after intercourse?"
"Correct. Intercourse occurred in 1997 and the infection showed up in 2011."
"So? No current sexual activity?"
"None."

Oh my goodness.

"So, what I want to do, is take a look at your bladder. With a small camera. It's not a big deal, kind of like a pap smear. Only different."
"NOW? Like, over there?" I point to the examination bench with the stirrups. You want me to take my pants off now?"
I am a confused, uptight, 51 year old woman whose Samson-like dad just had his manhood hair lopped off, been told (indirectly) that her house is ugly, (which is a reflection of her own personhood), and is too afraid of rejection to apply for another job. I am not emotionally ready to strip down and have a camera inserted into my privates.

She smiles.
"Oh no. That procedure is done at the hospital. It really is no big deal. I put some freezing on your bladder and you won't feel a thing."
"I'll be awake?"
"Honest. Just a little discomfort, but nothing to worry about."

She has no idea who she's dealing with. My legs? Are clenched together as I type this and she's going to need a crowbar and drugs to get me to allow her access. A camera? I don't care how tiny it is.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From there, I head over to the Lodge to bring joy and sunshine to my dad. Which is ironic, no? I feel like I'm  carrying around a lead blanket most days, and yet, here I am, with my big wide smile, hoping to cheer up my  ol man.

The visit goes unexpectedly well. He refused to eat his dinner earlier, so I spoon-fed him some of mom's pureed borscht. And some of the strawberry milkshake that the Schmidts left for him. And some thickened cranberry juice. He just wanted to go to bed after that, and I could relate. There are days when that's all I want to do too. He didn't mention his missing facial hair, and I didn't bring it up. I did tell him, a number of times, that he did look awfully handsome though.

I kept him up for another hour, and when I left, he seemed at peace. Yay dad. It'll grow back. Proud of you for being brave and accepting it. Or maybe you just forgot. Either way, Yay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Seeing I was only 10 minutes away, I hopped over the bridge and stopped in to see Max for a quick visit before heading into Vancouver to see Clint. (Who noticed, while trying to get some music to play in my truck, that the speakers on the right side don't work. Let me say it again, I will NEVER buy a vehicle from a used car lot again. NEVER. In my entire life.) And then, when I got home, Drew stopped by for 5 minutes to close the sliding door for me.

And just like that, my ups and downs mostly evened out.

Well, it WAS even until that small-bird-sized deranged moth flew into my kitchen and started attacking my face. Why my face? I DO NOT KNOW. But it keeps flying right at me.

Not a fan, moth. Not a fan.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three FIVE things I'm thankful for:
1.  Answered prayer re: my dad's naked upper lip. And his reaction to it.
2. My mom. She made a huge batch of borscht for my dad. He loves it.
3. The moth is dead.
4. I'm going to see Chris Tomlin tomorrow night.
5. Yellow purses. Turquoise wallets.

Shalom,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lamentations 3:22-23
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22-23
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22-23
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22-23
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22-23
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

You know how sometimes your mind dwells on ...

... things or people that are missing in your life?
Or conversations that have left you sad?
Or frustrating situations?
Or disagreements that ended unfairly?
Or hurts and hangups that remain hurtful and hang uppy and disappointing?

Yeah, well, if you're unemployed and live alone, there are a whole lot of hours in a day when the only voice you hear is the one in your head. And if you don't control that voice, holee hannna, is it ever easy to get in a rut, listing all the crap that is wrong with your life. It's becoming a struggle not to dwell on sad things these days.

A few days ago, I posted this on facebook:
Instead of worrying or reliving sad memories or getting anxious about tomorrow, think on THESE things:

Today, after the closing ceremonies, while sitting out in the backyard, I wanted to stop my inner voice from filling my soul with sludge, so I started writing a list of things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy.

The list is in my prayer journal and I hope to need to add to it every day.

Here's what I've got so far:

THINGS THAT ARE TRUE

• God loves me.
• He is continuing the good work He started in me.
• God loves Clint, Max and Drew and is continuing the work He started in them too.
• God's promises are all true.

THINGS THAT ARE NOBLE

THINGS THAT ARE RIGHT

• Praying instead of worrying is (the) right (thing to do).
• Families are right. Family units were God's idea.
• God's word is right. It's never wrong.

THINGS THAT ARE PURE

• The water that comes straight from my tap; it's pure. 
• My dad's love for my mom.
• The joy of the Olympic athletes. 

THINGS THAT ARE LOVELY

• Delphiniums.
• Hydrangeas.
• My kids' faces. 
• The house my dad built for my mom.
• The moon.
• My truck. Oh yes it is. 
• Greeting cards filled with nice words.

THINGS THAT ARE ADMIRABLE

• Max's willingness to share his story at detox centers.
• The apology I recently received from a friend. Whoa. Such transparency and vulnerability.

THINGS THAT ARE EXCELLENT

• Diamonds and pearls.
• Well-written books.
• Meryl Streep's ability to act.

THINGS THAT ARE PRAISEWORTHY

• The way God uses colors and textures so creatively.
• The way that God designed oceans to have breezes.
• Guys who get their One Year cakes (for being 'clean')

As you can see, I got stuck on 'noble'. I guess I don't really know what the word means... because I think a nobleman = a royal family member. So I supposed I could have put Wills, Kate and Harry's names in there, but somehow that seemed wrong.

So I just left it.
Then I read today's devotional ...

All your children will be taught by the Lord, and they will have much peace. Is 54:13
"Never underestimate the ponderings of a Christian parent. Never underestimate the power that comes when a parent pleads with God on behalf of their child. God listens to thoughtful parents.
Praying for our children is a noble task. If what we are doing is taking us away from prayer time for our children we're too busy. There is nothing more special, more precious, that time that a parent spends struggling and pondering and praying and pleading with God on behalf of a child."

... and proceeded to pray for my kids. " ... protect them from evil and harm. Speak to them clearly; enable them to hear and recognize your voice. Help them surrender their will to You. Guide their footsteps, direct their paths. Bring friends of YOUR choosing into their lives - friends that challenge and love them. Friends that help them see You more clearly. Send your messengers of Good News into their lives and enable them to embrace it. For Your Glory, may Clint, Max and Drew be leaders of men into Your kingdom..." etc

and I prayed for those couples that I know are pregnant
and I prayed for those couples that I know are engaged
and I prayed for those couples that I know are newlyweds

and I prayed for my daughter-in-laws and their families

and I prayed for my mom and my dad. (This isn't getting any easier. My dad is asking my mom if he couldn't please come live with her, he loves her and he'd be 'good'. Then he said, he'd been thinking and thinking and realized that maybe she was trying to get rid of him, by leaving him there.

Oh dad. I'm so sad that you're so broken. Heart disease, Parkinsons, Dementia, and Stroke.
And I'm sad that it's so lonely, living in a nursing/care home.
And I'm sad that you don't understand any of this.

And mom? I'm sad that you are in such pain. I'm praying you will feel relief today.)

Whoa. And just like that I'm sad again. I tell you. I have got to Stop Thinking.

ANYWAYS, it wasn't until just this moment, while I'm typing this out, that I noticed the sentence in the devotional: "Praying for our children is a NOBLE task."

Really? It is?
Well alrightly then.

THINGS THAT ARE NOBLE

• Praying for your kids
• Praying for your parents
• Praying for your parent's friends
• Praying for your kids' friends

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three FIVE things that I'm thankful for:

1. Cake night tonight at Max's NA Meeting. I'm thankful for these guys who are committed to living in recovery. I'm thankful that they support and care deeply for each other. I'm thankful that family relationships have been restored. I'm thankful for their transparency in sharing their struggles and victories. I'm thankful for their dependency on a Higher Power. I'm thankful for the 12 Steps Program. I'm thankful for each guy that shared this evening.
2. I am thankful for the Olympics. And the way it promotes not only excellence in athletics, but a global warm feeling. We are all connected. What happens on the other side of the globe, matters to us. Yay, Uganda for winning the Most Important Gold Medal. What is happening in your country? Do you need help? What can we do?
3. I am thankful for musicians. Seriously. Who doesn't love music? 
4. I am thankful for the cool night air. I love sitting here, beside an open window, and feel the breeze on my face. 
5. I am thankful that God is patient. 

Shalom,

~~~~~~~~~~~

2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.

2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.

2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.

2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.

2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.

Hope. Springs.

My mom and I went to the opening night of Meryl's latest movie, Hope Springs. It's about a couple (Meryl and Tommy Lee Jones) who've been married 31 years. She is wanting more than the comfortable (boring) routine that they plod through everyday. More affection. More intimacy. More romance. More touching. More connecting. More sex.

Yes, this was an interesting movie choice for us. I am not married, and while she is, she's kinda not. So all the sex counselling was a little wasted on us.

Steve Carrell, in a non-comedic role, was their marriage counsellor.

Some parts were painful to watch. Some parts were funny. And I imagine those middle aged couples in the audience probably had a few talking points to discuss once the movie was done. At least I hope so. What would be the point of watching, if you aren't going to take away something?

(Did you know there was another Hope Springs? Back in 2003? With, ahem, COLIN FIRTH? Filmed in Fort Langley? True story.

)

Anyway, I didn't find Hope Springs to be hilarious, but it was worth seeing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three FIVE things I'm thankful for:
1. A glorious sunny weekend.
2. A visit with my dad this morning that was not tension filled.
3. A FUN afternoon/evening with Maureen (and her men) at a free concert in Vancouver; Fun. ("Fun." is the name of the band. Give this song a listen.)

4. I live in the nicest corner of the earth. Which is round. So, no corners. Whatever.

5. Friends who are generous with their time.

Shalom,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Isaiah 40:28
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

Isaiah 40:28
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

Isaiah 40:28
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

Isaiah 40:28
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

Isaiah 40:28
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

'Nother One

Things I am Thankful For:

1. Another showing first thing in the morning. Was notified after 11 pm. Oy.
 But this is good.

2. Got my truck back today. Brand new transmission. YAY. Ford has an amazing Drive Train Warranty. EVERYTHING was covered. My total cost: zero pennies. Thanks, Dam's, for handing this all for me. If you're a fan of Fords, I highly recommend Dam's ...

3. Drew's birthday today. Dinner with my kids. Yay - second time this week. I'm feeling spoiled.

4. Coffee with a friend this afternoon - thankful I know people who are free to drive me around when I need a lift... And who share their wisdom with me when I need it.

5. Thankful that Colin Firth made Pride and Prejudice all those years ago. Watched the second/final disk of that BBC series this evening. Siiiigh. So many brooding, smouldering shots. So much longing expressed in those eyes. So much unexplained joy in my heart while watching.

Shalom,

John 14:6
Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the father except through me.”

John 14:6
Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the father except through me.”

John 14:6
Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the father except through me.”

John 14:6
Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the father except through me.”

John 14:6
Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the father except through me.”

HapPy BiRtHdAy to Youuuuu. Drew.

August 9, 1994. T'was a big day for me ...my third, brown-eyed, left-handed, Oboy was born; EXACTLY what I was praying for.

 Happy 18th Birthday, Drewbs. I love your big toothy grin, your enthusiasm for life, your positive attitude, your habit of saying 'no' first - and then changing your mind, and I love the way you treat your girl.

 I'm proud of you, and am looking forward to watching you grow into the man God created you to be.

 Praying for you daily, and love you forever.

Three FIVE things I'm thankful for:

1. These people (below): 

2. Lovely tea break with a friend in her garden this afternoon, while my home was being shown again for the eleventy hundredth time.

3. A good decent visit with my dad this evening. I at least got all his meds into him. :) Took an hour, and alot of creative thinking, but I won.  (My mom met with his doctor this afternoon, and she shared her concerns; he seems depressed, he's stopped eating, he talks of dying, he's refusing his meds, he's choking and gagging on phlegm build-up in his throat  ...) and he assured her this is all very normal and will even out shortly. He's on a new med, and it takes awhile to kick in. In the meantime, we're not to worry - everything is under control. And then he sat next to my dad on the bed, and said, "Peter? I'm looking after you. And believe me, I can keep you alive for many, many, MANY more years." 

So there's that.

4. Cheap movies at the Clova. Saw Spiderman tonight... such a fun movie. And, while it may seem like I'm bragging, but I'm totally not, Clint and/or Drew sure look alot like Peter Parker. It was a little like watching my own kid on the screen. Especially all that hopping and jumping and whatnot.

5. My boy? My baby? Is now 18. I'm so thankful for him. And all the joy he's brought into my life.

Shalom,

James 4:7
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

James 4:7
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

James 4:7
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

James 4:7
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

James 4:7
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

Awestruck.

"You want to see a movie? Or go for a walk?" I asked.
"It's the summer. Walk. At the beach," she replied.

So I picked her up after spending (some very difficult) time with my dad. (I don't want to talk about it.)
(But, man. THAT was crappy.)

We took the red pick up truck to Crescent, and just as we were parking, the rain started falling.
"We have lots to talk about. How about it we hang out in a restaurant ... I could be persuaded to have a salad," she suggested.

We talked.
She let me unload about my (most recent and gross) experiences with dad.
And then we moved on, and talked about my unemployedness, inevitable homelessness, my broken truck-edness, my empty nest, and how, really, once Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett got married, I lost interest in their story. Reading about their home, their kids, her sisters, his estate? Is a bit yawn-ish for me. I guess I need that brand-new-relationship-tension in a story to keep me reading. (Mind you, I'm only 1/4 in. It could still get hot-flashy ... (fingers crossed).

Then, she talked about, well, how everything in her life is kinda opposite of mine.
It's a good thing I'm not the  jealous type.

We noticed the restaurant was awfully quiet, and asked when they were closing.
"Half hour ago."
Embarrassed, we asked for our bills. (You know, if they'd brought us our bills earlier, and mentioned they were getting ready to close, we would have left. WITH NO HARD FEELINGS. Why do some restaurants leave you sitting there like fools?)

Anyway, we walked toward the beach, and it was glowing. The air was snappy. People were lined up along the shore, excited.

As we got closer, we realized they were watching a lightning show in the distance. And so we watched too. It was mesmerizing. And then it got closer and closer. And the lightning went from forked to sheet and it lit up the entire beach. And it was amazing. And spectacular. And wonderful. And unlike any lightning show I'd ever seen in my entire 51 years on this earth. And it went on and on. For hours. We just stood there, awestruck. There was thunder too. Deep, rumbling thunder, that exploded in your chest. Thunder that erupted at the same time as when the lightning stretched across the sky and plunged into the ground in front of us.

Just down the beach from us, a large group of family and friends had gathered to say a final goodbye to a loved one. What a backdrop they had. Wow.

And then, in the midst of the storm, they released four sky lanterns.
Oh My Goodness. SO MAGICAL.

In case you didn't see Tangled, Sky Lanterns, look like this in the movies:

And like this in real life:

They 'only' released four, but it was still pretty amazing. If you need to know more about these floating fireballs, check out this website.

Anyway, my evening, the one that started so heavy and sad? Ended up feeling magical. 

And God-Moment-y. 

I stood there, on that beach, and gazed at an unobstructed view of the massive sky above me, and watched God display his power, his creativity, his command of the earth, for over two hours. Sandra may have been a little nervous about our safety. I agreed that maybe she wouldn't want to stand too close to me; I'm a bit of a magnet for 'unfortunate incidents' these days... and getting hit by lightning wouldn't have surprised me. 

Three FIVE things I'm thankful for:

1. Storms that don't include rain. 

2. Friends who listen.

3. Another showing tomorrow. Someone will eventually like it.

4. Late night texts, instant messages and emails with my kids. 

5. Random daily devotional that seems tailor-fit for me:

"When we submit to God's plans, we can trust our desires. Our assignment is found at the intersection of God's plan and our pleasures. What do you love to do? What brings you joy? What gives you a sense of satisfaction? 

The longings of your heart, then, are not incidental; they are critical messages. The desires of your heart are not to be ignored; they are to be consulted. As the wind turns the weather vane, so God uses your passions to turn your life. God is too gracious to ask you to do something you hate.

Shalom,

Psalm 119:105
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.

Psalm 119:105
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.

Psalm 119:105
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.

Psalm 119:105
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.

Psalm 119:105
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.